As any Upper West Sider who has looked for an apartment knows, brokers have lots of words to make tiny apartments seem more appealing — Cozy! Quaint! Homey!
But one apartment at 114 West 71st street that just hit the market is so small — just 100 square feet — one broker just accepted it and had some fun. Frankly, it’s pretty amusing.
– This apartment is so small, you can’t have three friends over at the same time; one of you will have to wait outside in the hall.
– It’s so small you can’t gain weight once you move in.
– It’s so small there’s a bumper on the front door to keep it from hitting the back wall.
– It’s so small you have to move the bed just to open and close the front door.
(He notes that none of these things are literally true.) The apartment has no kitchen or stove, a shower in the bedroom and the bathroom is “separated” from the bedroom with a purple curtain. It’s a fourth-floor walkup too. For $1,100, it can be yours. The broker notes that it’s the lowest possible price you can pay to move into the West 70’s these days.
“And look at the bright sides of such an apartment: 4th floor walkup means you’ll stay in shape; no separate kitchen area or stove means no dishes to clean; and an apartment this cheap means the 15% broker fee is still under $2000. Where can you find THAT in this area? :)”
We last wrote about the apartment here. Judging from the rental history, not many people can seem to last there for very long.
For more on tiny UWS apartments, click here.
Hat-tip to Curbed.