West Side Rag
  • TOP NEWS
  • OPEN/CLOSED
  • FOOD
  • SCHOOLS
  • OUTDOORS
  • REAL ESTATE
  • ART & CULTURE
  • POLITICS
  • COLUMNS
  • CRIME
  • HISTORY
  • ABSURDITY
  • ABOUT US
    • OUR STORY
    • CONTRIBUTORS
    • CONTACT
West Side Rag
No Result
View All Result
SUPPORT THE RAG

Search the site

No Result
View All Result
Get WSR FREE in your inbox
SUPPORT THE RAG

Weekend Column: An Upper West Sider’s Field of Dreams

February 26, 2022 | 11:20 AM
in COLUMNS
4
Photographs by Allan Ripp.

By Allan Ripp

I dribble across midcourt with the game clock flashing 10 seconds left and our team down by one. I fake left, but go right as a defender gets in my face, then step back and launch an arching shot to the hoop. It hits the rim but I deftly grab my own rebound and finger roll the ball in for a buzzer-beating win. The crowd erupts.

OK, reality-check rewind. I am walking in Central Park and pull a used hand warmer from my jacket pocket, which I proceed to lob at a nearby garbage receptacle. It misses the opening and slides feebly to the ground, where I scoop it up and deposit it in the cannister like a good citizen. “Nice try,” someone snickers passing by.

I haven’t been on an actual basketball court in years — or baseball diamond, football gridiron or other field of play. Nor have I ever filled out a fantasy football lineup. But that doesn’t mean I’ve lost my competitive drive or highlight-reel reveries. Slogging through my daily routines around the Upper West Side, greatness is always close at hand.

A rolled-up pair of socks is a Kareem-worthy skyhook to the hamper. A found acorn near the Reservoir becomes a strikeout pitch against a tree. And a stutter-step move past some lumbering tourists near Zabar’s gains first-down yardage towards the end zone on the next block. Sometimes, back in the park, I have to finesse my way around a shrewd defender guarding the basket – or is that just a raccoon rummaging through the trash at 90th Street?

Anyone who’s ever played sports dreams of clutch moments. As a kid, I could conjure nine innings of play-by-play excitement just by throwing a rubber ball against a wall, channeling performances from my gods Roberto Clemente, Bob Gibson and Bill Mazeroski. It took but a Nerf sponge ball and a wastebasket to turn my shag-carpeted bedroom into Madison Square Garden for NCAA finals, match-up brackets included (all my friends did their own version of a cheering crowd).

You want sports betting? My son Asher and I wager big – how about $1 million if I land our dog’s stuffed beaver in the basket at the far side of the living room? So, I missed. Let’s go double or nothing on this crumbled ball of foil wrap into the kitchen trash, with a $500K sweetener if I bank it off a cabinet.

Recent research shows evidence of mood swings, anxiety and other mental-health risks among those who engage in fantasy sports leagues, no surprise given the obsessive, job-like stresses of running even a make-believe team with stats and trade deadlines. Fantasy sports is not the same as sports fantasy, which can strike anytime, anywhere.

I’ll never get to a Super Bowl or an Olympics, and long ago missed my chance at a Little League championship. But a shot at glory awaits me wherever I go – you just have to know where to find it. And your team never loses.

Mr. Ripp runs a press relations firm in New York.

Share this article:
SUPPORT THE RAG
guest

guest

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

4 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Alison Curry
Alison Curry
3 years ago

I love this charming article! I used to implore my husband to take pride in such things, asking sincerely — Why is it magical to swoosh the basketball in the net, and lackluster to dunk your socks in the hamper?

0
Reply
tim
tim
3 years ago

pickleball is always an option
carpe diem

0
Reply
Catherine Arcure
Catherine Arcure
3 years ago

Wonderful piece! Thanks.

0
Reply
B. J. Rahn
B. J. Rahn
3 years ago

This delightful bit of whimsy is proof positive of the ability of the imagination to change moods and lift spirits. And it’s available to everyone at no cost. What a wonderful way to transform dull or disappointing circumstance into gilded happenstance.

0
Reply

YOU MIGHT LIKE...

Happy Father’s Day Upper West Side!
ART

Happy Father’s Day Upper West Side!

June 15, 2025 | 8:15 AM
WSR Cartoon: Upper West Side Dad Polling Well
ABSURDITY

WSR Cartoon: Upper West Side Dad Polling Well

June 15, 2025 | 8:03 AM
Previous Post

Meet the Audiologist: What’s New In Hearing Aids, March 1, 6:00-7:30PM

Next Post

Upper West Sider’s Death Spurs MTA Plan to Test Subway Platform Barriers at Three Stations, Sources Say

this week's events image
Next Post
THERE’S A REASON THE 1 TRAIN HAS BEEN UNNATURALLY STEAMY THIS SUMMER

Upper West Sider's Death Spurs MTA Plan to Test Subway Platform Barriers at Three Stations, Sources Say

New Community Food & Juice on 72nd Street to Open March 1

New Community Food & Juice on 72nd Street to Open March 1

Scent-Seeking Shoplifter Hits Marshalls: NYPD

Scent-Seeking Shoplifter Hits Marshalls: NYPD

  • ABOUT US
  • CONTACT US
  • NEWSLETTER
  • WSR MERCH!
  • ADVERTISE
  • EVENTS
  • PRIVACY POLICY
  • TERMS OF USE
  • SITE MAP
Site design by RLDGROUP

© 2025 West Side Rag | All rights reserved.

No Result
View All Result
  • TOP NEWS
  • THIS WEEK’S EVENTS
  • OPEN/CLOSED
  • FOOD
  • SCHOOLS
  • OUTDOORS
  • REAL ESTATE
  • ART & CULTURE
  • POLITICS
  • COLUMNS
  • CRIME
  • HISTORY
  • ABSURDITY
  • ABOUT
    • OUR STORY
    • CONTRIBUTORS
    • CONTACT US
  • WSR SHOP

© 2025 West Side Rag | All rights reserved.