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‘Do Over — A Fantasy’

November 5, 2023 | 12:24 PM - Updated on November 6, 2023 | 5:24 AM
in ABSURDITY, ART, HISTORY
5
Currier and Ives, courtesy of Wikimedia Commons.

“Do Over — A Fantasy”
By Art Stamford

Two old men in an Uber car
rode to the Grant’s Tomb part of town.
They found Grant chomping a big cigar –
just the dude they were hunting down.

“Jefferson Davis, Gen’ral Lee,
what can I do for you?
Surely you can’t be looking for me –
our business is long since through.”

“Grant,” said Lee, “we have a simple request-
join us in a time machine.
When we last met, we weren’t at our best –
let’s find out what might have been.”

“Lee,” said Grant, “I think you’re unhinged –
there’s no such thing as time machines.
You and Davis must have overbinged
on Nintendo when you were teens.”

“If I may, sir” – Davis’ voice was polite –
“we’ve gamed it out as you say.
And what we’ve learned doing it night after night
is we might well have won the day.”

“But you didn’t,” said Grant, “We certainly won,
and slavery’s decidedly dead.
You have to accept it – it’s over and done –
not in vain have so many bled.”

“What about those who died on our side –
are you saying they died in vain?
It’s not over for us while thoughts of them abide –
you must let us try again.”

“Hitler,” said Grant, “re-did World War One,
the Russians want back Ukraine,
the Mideast Wars are never done –
is this what you hope to gain?

“Things have to be settled – we have to move on –
we can’t have a do-over war.
Can’t you see? It’s over and done –
we’ve resolved what the fighting was for.”

“For us the British would turn the tide,”
went on Davis persistently.
“They really meant to come in on our side –
and of course we have General Lee.”

“What they meant doesn’t count,” said Grant stubbornly,
“and they didn’t come in on your side.
Conceding the brilliance of General Lee,
it did nothing to turn the tide.”

“You’re a poor winner, sir,” Davis said now,
“you should learn to be more big hearted.”
And both giving Grant a brisk little bow
they took their leave and departed.

They retired to a bar that was not very far
and started working up a new plan.
It just wasn’t right that Grant wouldn’t fight –
he was not a gentleman.

And so now we ask: will they manage the task,
will war buffs have a new day?
And how soon will it be till we once again see
the nation in complete disarray?

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5 Comments
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Margret
Margret
2 years ago

With a heavy heart-this must have been written.

0
Reply
neighbor785
neighbor785
2 years ago

Chilling but looking all too true.

0
Reply
OPOD
OPOD
2 years ago

I don’t believe there has ever been a time in history when so many moderate Americans believe an actual 2nd Civil war is possible in the United States. This war would not be between geographical differences but political. It’s a horrible thought,

0
Reply
Peter
Peter
2 years ago
Reply to  OPOD

Yes it would. Especially considering who is armed and who isn’t.

0
Reply
Joe Not Rogen
Joe Not Rogen
2 years ago

Sad to admit it but the nation is already in disarray.
The left & the right are to blame, as always.
Cancel culture and uber political correctness on one side.
Ultra national motives and resentment on the other side.
Are we not all American?
Some say yes while others say no.
Free speech is in danger of exiting.
Decent conversations are leaving our daily lives.
Trust in God has been put on a shelf.
Trust in big government is on the rise.
Drill baby drill is replaced with $4 for regular gas.
Two men of 158 years old combined running for POTUS.
Fear and hatred replacing love & compassion.
Are we not all American?

1
Reply

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