By A. Campbell
Good morning! My name is Tanqueray – Tanq for short – and it’s an especially beautiful morning for me because today is…MY BIRTHDAY! Aaaaahh!! I’m turning three years old. Later on, I’ll host a few friends for a party featuring a much-anticipated squirrel cake – a special request from my devoted Dads – made by the talented pup-friendly pastry chefs at Axel & Tia.
My Dads adopted me from Muddy Paws when I was nine weeks old and while they both grew up with dogs, I’m the first pup they’ve ever had together, so it goes without saying that mine is a life of preferential only child treatment.
Each morning, it’s coffee and snuggles in bed around 7am. Afterward, Dad and I are heading out the door by 7:30am and making a beeline for Central Park. We’ll walk for at least two hours and I’ll trot along behind Dad, occasionally stopping to say hello to other pups or to stealthily stalk a squirrel. You see, a novice squirrel hunter will just bound after them without a well-conceived strategy, but a clever dog knows you have to exercise patience and a keen ability to anticipate the critter’s every move.
I’ll crouch down like a lioness on the savanna, keeping my eye trained on the squirrel. If he stops and looks around, I’ll stop and lay low in the grass. When he dashes ahead, I cut him off at the pass by rushing straight to the base of the tree. The whole scene is like something out of a National Geographic documentary.
Despite my best efforts, I’ve only caught one once and then promptly let it go. Catch-and-release is always the best policy. When I’m not spending time in the park, I like to escort my Dads around town on errands. I’m a mixture of American Staffordshire Terrier, American Pit Bull, Dachshund (see my little feet?), and Border Collie. My gentlemanly manners and working dog instincts shine through when I insist on carrying home packages and goodies from our favorite local eateries. You might spy me trotting down the street with a golden baguette or a bag of coffee from Blue Bottle delicately clenched between my teeth. Of course, my favorite place to go is Zabar’s! Their smoked salmon is to die for and my Dads know that I’m so well trained, I won’t even attempt to sneak a bite until we’re back home.
If we’re heading back uptown after a long Central Park walk, I’ll stop into Jonathan Adler on Columbus Avenue and say hello to the very sweet staff members. They’re always ready to dole out treats and head scratches. Rest assured, I’m not putting on an ounce of weight from all the aforementioned treats because the day isn’t over until Dad and I have completed another two-hour-walk together in the evening. All told, we’ll usually log between 8 and 11 miles walked each day. Whew!
When I’m not pounding the city pavement, I like to stay active at the beach. The crashing waves, the sunshine, the warm sand! It’s so relaxing. We’ll escape the city to visit relatives in Maryland or take a little vacation out to the Hamptons. As soon as the car door opens, I’ll run down to the beach as fast as my little legs can carry me and go diving straight in to the water. Now you can picture what I’ll look like tonight when I go diving into my birthday cake!
If you think your pup deserves a shot at neighborhood fame, we encourage you to reach out to Audrey at firstname.lastname@example.org to be considered for a future profile on West Side Rag and follow your fellow Pupper West Sider’s adventures on Instagram at @pupper_west_side_uws
If readers are interested in becoming pet owners, we encourage you to consider adopting or volunteering to be a foster parent with one of the many shelters and nonprofits based in and around New York City. These include but aren’t limited to Muddy Paws Rescue; Animal Lighthouse Rescue; Animal Care Centers of NYC; NYC ASPCA; Humane Society of New York; Bideawee; Social Tees; Badass Brooklyn Animal Rescue and Animal Haven.