Here’s to the Upper West Side — Making Us Wait, Making Us Better

 By Yvonne Vávra

Upper West Siders have spent a lot of time waiting — whether it’s for Wegmans, the decades-long Metro Theater saga to finally culminate in some sort of opening ceremony (at this point, any ceremony will do), or for answers to our burning Absolute Bagels questions: Who’s behind the “New Absolute Bagel” signage at the storefront of the shuttered icon? How absolutely excited should we allow ourselves to get?

Sometimes, patience really does pay off — as it did for the woman who waited over a decade for justice after her fateful encounter with fish guts outside Citarella on 75th Street and Broadway. She slipped on the ocean goo in the summer of 2014, twisting her knee and flipping her life upside down. The fall cost the salsa dancer multiple surgeries and her way back to the dance floor. But two weeks ago, finally, a Manhattan jury awarded her $6.45 million.

Remember when we spent nearly a decade wondering if the rumors about Kossar’s coming to the Upper West Side were true? They were. Almost exactly a year ago, the famous bagels and bialys bakery finally opened at the corner of West 72nd Street and West End Avenue, rewarding our patience with authentic recipes straight from 17th-century Eastern Europe. And as if to make up for lost time, they’ve just opened a second outpost on West End Avenue between 61st and 62nd Streets.

Waiting feels inherently uncomfortable. Sometimes even painful, like for the residents of West 91st Street, who were plagued by a constant high-pitched ringing noise and had to wait over a week for it to stop. In waiting, time seems to pass in relation to some point in the future, trapping us in an in-between state with many unknowns and little to hold on to. Our brains are wired to seek predictability, so being stuck in limbo feels unnatural. Waiting does nothing but remind us that we want something we don’t have yet — and reveal how we fool ourselves into thinking we control our lives.

So please excuse the frustration over being mocked by these juicy, beach ball-sized chicken chunks on display in the windows of the former Bed Bath & Beyond at the corner of Broadway and 65th Street. We’ve been teased with the promise of Wegmans moving into that space for nearly a year now — official signage went up last June. Why are these protein props still trying to get us excited? Instead of living our best shopping life, we’re at the mercy of an opening that’s playing hard to get. Someone on the Upper West Side board on Reddit claims they’ve heard from inside sources that it might not happen for a few more years. Years?! Enough with the grocery games. Let us in already!

Look, we’re not great at waiting. But maybe that’s for the best, because not getting what we want right away can actually be pretty amazing.

I grew up in East Berlin, behind the Wall — a place where getting what you wanted was rare, let alone getting it when you wanted it. The average wait time for a Trabant, our miraculous little car made of plastic reinforced with recycled cotton, was ten to fifteen years. Some East Germans are technically still waiting, because when the Wall fell, so did the Trabant.

Growing up in an economy that wasn’t built to fulfill your every need, I got to know the joys of anticipation. As a kid, I was obsessed with cornflakes. Mostly because I hardly ever had any. Once in a blue moon, you’d spot a bag in someone’s cart at the supermarket. That’s when you’d pick up the pace — determined but casual. No need to alert the others that there was something worth grabbing. On those rare, golden days, when I got my hands on cornflakes, I found true happiness in the cereal aisle.

Now? Now there’s cereal as far as the eye can see. Cornflakes now? Meh. What’s so brilliant about toasted maize anyway? What’s so great about anything when you can have it all the time?

We’ve gotten used to instant gratification, but we’re missing out. Because longing gives us time to reflect on why we want something, imagine how it might feel, get emotionally invested. By the time the moment comes, it’s not just cornflakes anymore. It’s a grand finale.

So let’s take a moment to thank the Metro Theater on Broadway between West 99th and 100th streets for the thrill. The ache. The wait. It’s held us in epic anticipation since May 2011, when the Rag first reported that something new was coming to the historic 1933 theater, which had closed in 2005. Since then, we’ve patiently weathered years of rumors about various scenarios for a Metro reopening. Years of hopes raised, then dashed. Last month, the Rag announced: The Metro will reopen as a cinema arts and education center. Well. Let’s wait. But when that day really comes? It’ll feel like cornflakes back in the day.

If it’s any consolation, all this waiting might actually be good for us. Studies show that patient people experience less depression and are better equipped to cope with difficult situations. They feel more connected to others and are generally happier and more satisfied with their lives. So here’s to the Upper West Side — for giving us plenty of opportunities to practice patience. We’ve got this down.

Yvonne Vávra is a magazine writer and author of the German book 111 Gründe New York zu lieben (111 Reasons to Love New York). Born a Berliner but an aspiring Upper West Sider since the 1990s (thanks, Nora Ephron), she came to New York in 2010 and seven years later made her Upper West Side dreams come true. She’s been obsessively walking the neighborhood ever since.

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