
by Yvonne Vávra
One of life’s sweetest pleasures is when a drawer breaks. When reality spills out of the filing cabinet we’ve built to keep it tidy. We file people away because it’s easier than holding the world’s full, chaotic complexity in our heads. But every now and then, someone refuses to stay in the folder we’ve put them in.
That’s what happened a few weeks ago on the corner of West 83rd Street and Columbus. A woman’s shopping bag couldn’t handle the stress anymore and broke just as she stepped into the crosswalk. Groceries everywhere. Apples rolled toward the curb. Dinner made a run for it while the light changed. A deliverista stopped, leaned his bike against the parking meter, and joined the woman in chasing apples. He pulled a sturdy bag from the back of his bike and together they packed the groceries into it. Then each went their separate ways.
I felt so joyful. Not only for witnessing an act of kindness, but because I’d watched a stereotype fall apart. In many people’s minds, delivery bikers have been cast as inconsiderate menaces to society. Watching this man stop to help a stranger reminded me that mental shortcuts may give us a sense of order in an overwhelming world, but they never do justice to the people inside it. Here was a man climbing out of the drawer he’d been tucked into. Here was proof that the world is so much richer than our anxious minds often allow it to be.
My groggy faith in humanity needed more moments like this. The problem is, they’re rarely the loudest stories in the room. Determined to pay a different kind of attention, I went through neighborhood online platforms, and there, tucked among the complaints and frustrations, I found posts that revealed the many ways neighbors show up and look out for each other.
One poster found a pigeon in distress on Broadway. She was already late for work and couldn’t help the bird herself, so she asked if anyone could step in and bring it to the Wild Bird Fund. Several neighbors responded, and while I never found out exactly what happened, someone wrote that they walked by the spot on Broadway a short time later, and the bird was gone.
Last week, an Upper West Sider turned to Reddit in search of a laptop-friendly place to work remotely. Within an hour, dozens of neighbors had turned the question into a brainstorming session, sharing thoughtful recommendations I’ll definitely be checking out myself.
Some cases are more urgent. One woman had just eaten her very first hamentasch and was instantly hooked. There was just one problem: it had been a gift at work, and there was no way of finding out where it had come from. Naturally, she posted a picture of the hamentasch, minus one bite, trusting that someone would know exactly where it came from and point her toward her next fix. Sure enough, identifying anonymous hamentaschen is a skill the Upper West Side possesses in abundance. Fairway, Hungarian Pastry Shop, William Greenberg, Zabar’s—the woman now has several promising leads that will either reunite her with her original hamentasch or spark a whole new obsession.
And then there’s the story of an act of kindness that changed lives a few years ago on Columbus Avenue and 70th Street. And we’re all still benefiting from it. It begins with two New Yorkers, both dealing with life’s curveballs.
Victor Neufeld had spent decades producing television, earning 23 Emmys along the way, and singing jazz whenever he had the chance. His wife had been diagnosed with early-onset dementia, and for many years, Victor cared for her until she passed away just as COVID hit the city.
Then, one day, while crossing a street on the Upper West Side, Victor was struck by a car and spent weeks in the hospital recovering from life-threatening injuries.
Meanwhile, Manny Colon, who had managed Bistro Cassis on Columbus Avenue for 15 years, was facing a crisis of his own. For years, Manny had managed life with an enlarged heart. Then his condition worsened, and he spent six weeks in the hospital connected to a mechanical heart before finally receiving a transplant. He then returned to work, and a little under a year later, Bistro Cassis was shuttered because of the pandemic, and its owner made the decision to walk away.
So Manny took over. He fixed up the space, breathed new life into it, and reopened it as Manny’s Bistro in the fall of 2020. But business was still slow.
Enter Victor, still recovering and finding strength and inspiration in his music. He’d heard from friends about Manny’s story and offered to sing at the bistro to help bring in diners. Every spring and summer since then, Victor’s jazz band has performed outside Manny’s on Sunday afternoons, never failing to draw a crowd. The way these two men, whose lives had been knocked sideways, found a way to help each other move forward—well, we’re dancing to the sound of that every Sunday from 4 to 7 p.m.
The deliverista, the pigeon rescuers, the hamentasch detectives, and Victor and Manny are all part of an Upper West Side story filled with care, generosity, and people willing to jump in. Next time our inner neighborhood grump is triggered, it might be fun to imagine that the person whose breath we could practically feel on our necks as they passed us a little too closely—one of those people!!—might actually be a hamentaschen hero on a mission to solve a pastry mystery for a neighbor. There might be more to their story. There usually is.
Yvonne Vávra is a magazine writer and author of the German book 111 Gründe New York zu lieben (111 Reasons to Love New York). Born a Berliner but an aspiring Upper West Sider since the 1990s (thanks, Nora Ephron), she came to New York in 2010 and seven years later made her Upper West Side dreams come true. She’s been obsessively walking the neighborhood ever since.
This story was updated to reflect that Manny was connected to a mechanical heart for six weeks, not months, and that he returned to work before the COVID pandemic.
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Love!!!
Thanks Yvonne, I needed this!
Lovely.
another wonderful piece Yvonne! This line is the best “Dinner made a run for it while the light changed.” But esp grateful for the story on Manny and victor- I did not know these backstories and it will make my meals there on the Sunday all the more meaningful.
Beautiful stories, beautifully told. I appreciate your wonder-ful perspective and writing, humanizing our neighbors and neighborhood in a beautiful way.
I enjoy each and every post. Thank you. 🙏
Thank you for this lovely start to the day, and to a new month.
Thank you for this wonderful antidote to the daily headlines. Lovely writing.
NYers are nice. I’ve seen helpfulness a lot.
It’s so uplifting and lovely
I love our UWS. I love you guys. I love our elders. Nothing like us. Yes, we are New Yorkers, what can we do? but we are a also a loving and helping community.
Thank you for this wonderful piece!
Great article. The kiss pic does not go with it at all. It’s about random strangers. WTF?
They’re not kissing. Just dancing in front of Manny’s. 🙂
They are dancing in front of Manny’s restaurant
Yvonne! You make my day. Thank you.
Very sweet. You’d make Nora happy 😊
This was heartwarming. Such great writing. I’m looking forward to being at Manny’s in August and enjoying Victor’s singing. Maybe Tony Danza will show up?
What a lovely story and a salve in our anxious world.
Love these stories! Thank you! We need a regular dose of this!
Love Manny’s Bistro! Consistently good food and service! Often Tony Danza sings with the musical group. So much fun!
Beautiful story! It reminds us to give people the benefit of doubt and to be helpful and kind. Once my shopping bag broke and I didn’t realize it but I had lost my shrimp. I retraced my steps looking on the ground and a stranger asked if I was looking for shrimp and directed me to the spot where they were found!
Lovely and oh so true! The majority of people are good, decent, and caring. They may also be overwhelmed, over-busy, rushing, dissociated, and clueless, but that doesn’t mean that they intend to be cold or dismissive. If given the chance/opportunity, most, I have found, will stop, hold the door, pick up an errant apple, bend to lift a stroller up some stairs, offer directions, give advice, be good neighbors. Here’s to seeing and celebrating the often small, quiet corners of humanity’s every day kindness. Thank you!
Thank you Yvonne Vavra for helping me to continue to love and appreciate my neighborhood after 36 years.
Thank you for pointing out so beautifully the acts of kindness that occur in our neighborhood every day! I’m confident we could all add to this list and it would go on indefinitely. Your writing uplifts us all.
I just love reading your stories!
Thank you,Yvonne! #blessed&grateful
Forgive me for seeing beyond the single anecdotal example of the deliverista. Deliveristas ARE a menace in general. And who’s to say that this particular young man, after doing his good deed, did not immediately afterward go through multiple red lights (ignoring pedestrians), ride the wrong way up a one-way street, and/or ride on the sidewalk?
While his act of kindness is laudatory, it does not give us anything NEAR a full picture of the laws he (probably) breaks on a consistent basis, and the pedestrians he (likely) puts in danger every day – much less is it a reflection on deliveristas in general.
Call me a curmudgeon, but I think most people know I’m right.
You are a curmudgeon!
LOL.
You’re a curmudgeon. 🙂 (You said to call you one.)
LOL.
If you order delivery yourself, you are responsible for the system that pushes the delivery guys at a grim pace. They aren’t speeding for the kicks, you know. It’s a reflection on *us* that we both demand rapid delivery and then call the delivery guys inconsiderate or menaces when they do what they have to do to provide it!
I never order anything that is delivered by a deliverista. And if they have to put pedestrians in danger in order to “do what they have to,” then there is something drastically wrong with the system.
Are you under the impression that the deliveristas designed this system, or have any control over it, or doing anything other than working as fast as they possibly can to meet the demands of a corporate overlord who doesn’t value our safety one bit?
Deliveristas are human beings who work hard for their families. Talk to them — get to know them — before you judge them. If you don’t want them here, stop ordering from stores/restaurants. BTW UWS people are far from sainthood. I would try to get to know more of them if they would keep their dogs at a distance so I COULD talk with them (and not their dogs).
And you know what Yvonne Vávra? You are part of this community of neighbors showing up and looking out for each other by writing these beautiful essays and sharing them with us, leading us to discover the incredible past and present of so much in our own neighborhood. I just love you!
What a beautiful, clever & inspiring verbal portrait!
Thank you Yvonne Vavra
What a fabulous article. So interesting and life affirming. Thank you thank you
You’re a treasure.
If you look, you can see these acts of kindness going on around in the city almost every day. If you ride transit, you’ll see people giving up their seats to others. If someone unknowingly drops their phone, people will race to let them know. People hold doors for the mobility-impaired. Yes, obviously, not everyone, everywhere, not enough–but if you want individual examples to contemplate, they are out there. New Yorkers are brusquely, efficiently kind.
Yes. Just putting your device away and giving passersby a smile is something. Remember when people would comment on the weather with strangers?
Her writing is such a gift to us all! Thank you so much, Yvonne!! Every week you bring something wonderful.
Thank you for this article.
I’ve been patronizing Manny’s Bistro for ages, going back to the Bistro Cassis era. Manny is wonderful. I had no idea what he went through. Hats off to him and Victor for this gem of a place in the heart of the UWS.
Wonderful piece.
That’s a beautiful post of acts of kindness. Thank you. We needed that!
A really wonderful article, thank you.
I’m so lucky I live on the UWS. I never take it for granted. Thank you for your love letter to our neighborhood.
Please tell us the provenance of those well-baked hamantashen in the lower panel of the photo!!
Wonderful random acts of kindness, but the delivery person braking to help a stranger especially warmed my heart. Thank you for all of these stories AND for helping to disarm bias. When we see each other, we are our better selves.
Visiting from the Midwest. I don’t understand why human ‘kindness’ becomes a story. We talk to and know everyone. A helping hand is the only hand we have. And we don’t need a pat on the back for it.
Are you sure? Because you seem to be patting yourself pretty hard right now.
Wendi is absolutely right. It is responses like yours that prove it.
It’s not to say that we are better than others or it is a superhuman act, it’s to say it is a human act, something to be thankful for and appreciate that New Yorkers rep of being brusque and busy can be less true than the potential people have and have expressed in action to take the kind route. Am glad that where you live you see it on a regular basis. Thanks for continuing to keep that trend going…
So perfectly pitched and moving. Gratuliere!
Small moments, huge impacts, forever thankful to you for highlighting the infinite possibilities for connection and meaning through reaching out and stepping in from and to benefit members of a community and how each one builds the whole, whether they know it or not…
Loved this piece about my neighborhood! Sending to all my friends outside this city. Thank you!
There isn’t anyone you couldn’t love once you’ve heard their story”. (Including e bike delivery guys!)– Sister Mary Lou Kownacki.
This is the neighborhood I moved into in 1999. I loved it then and still love it now. Unfortunately, these type of stories were much more commonplace in 1999 than they are today.