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MORNING BULLETIN: LOCAL CHALLENGES TED CRUZ, SEINFELD’S NEUROTIC DACHSHUND

February 22, 2016 | 2:16 PM
in NEWS
4

san remo moon
Photo of the San Remo by Kimberly.

February 22, 2016 Weather: Mostly sunny, with a high of 47 degrees.

Notices:
A special Shakespeare performance at the NYPL for the Performing Arts and dozens of other local events on our calendar.

Ernie Fritz has released his full film “Don’t Even Think of Parking Here” on YouTube. “This 13:30 minute film is about the NYC ritual of Alternate Side of the Street Parking, and the lengths that New Yorkers go to find a spot that is ‘good for tomorrow.’  As one of the characters says, ‘If you have a good parking space, it’s like gold.'”

News:
An Upper West Sider is suing the state Board of Elections to test whether Ted Cruz should be on the ballot for the primary, given that he was born in Canada. “Korman, 81, of West 96th Street, declined to comment. But his lawyer, Roger Bernstein, said Korman is an independent who wants to resolve the matter before the New York state primary in April.”

A construction worker was killed by his van in Central Park on Monday. “A construction worker inspecting his work van died after the vehicle suddenly began to roll, crushing him beneath it in Central Park Monday morning, police said. The man, who was dressed in a MSM Empire Construction Co. shirt, stopped his white construction van on East Drive near The Loeb Boathouse to examine a mechanical issue around 6:40 a.m., authorities said.”

Shane Richards is making waves on the Manhattan College basketball team, despite long odds. “There was no chance the skinny kid from the Upper West Side was ever going to have the goods to play big-time college basketball.”

Jerry Seinfeld has a neurotic Dachshund, so he had a celebrity dog trainer come by. “The sausage dog, one of two the comic owns, barked so manically every time Seinfeld walked into the room that he complained to Millan, “I’m loved by millions, and hated by one dog.'” On another note, can we bring Seinfeld back and make a show about this incident?

In other Seinfeld news, Steve Martin opened for him at The Beacon.

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4 Comments
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zeus
zeus
6 years ago

Re Seinfeld:

The dog doesn’t get the jokes.
Most 2 legged these days don’t either.
Saw the show.
Jerry’s not that funny anymore.
Blah, blah, blah…..

0
Reply
auntiedi
auntiedi
6 years ago

I think, perhaps, you meant to say yada, yada, yada?

0
Reply
Ted
Ted
6 years ago

Walking into Central Park one beautiful afternoon at 81 and CPW, I noticed a couple waling towards us, him pushing a double wide stroller.

The two children in the stroller both had large balloon animals that I assumed were from a party. The younger child was crying in that, “I want my older sibling to get in trouble” sort of fakey way, and said, “He hit me first”.

The mother said, “why don’t we try to forget about who hit who first and just enjoy our animals.” One hits the other with a balloon again. Bedlam ensues.

I notice the father who is looking ahead into the middle distance with this vaguely bemuse, exasperated look on his face, as if thinking, “Really, this is my life? I worked so hard for this? Things can’t stay like this forever. Can they?”

The father was Jerry Seinfeld.
But at that precise moment he was nothing but a dad enduring his kids meltdowns. No amount of Seinfeld cash could change the situation.

0
Reply
92nd street
92nd street
6 years ago

“I may have stepped on her arm”

0
Reply

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Get WSR FREE in your inbox

MORNING BULLETIN: LOCAL CHALLENGES TED CRUZ, SEINFELD’S NEUROTIC DACHSHUND

san remo moon
Photo of the San Remo by Kimberly.

February 22, 2016 Weather: Mostly sunny, with a high of 47 degrees.

Notices:
A special Shakespeare performance at the NYPL for the Performing Arts and dozens of other local events on our calendar.

Ernie Fritz has released his full film “Don’t Even Think of Parking Here” on YouTube. “This 13:30 minute film is about the NYC ritual of Alternate Side of the Street Parking, and the lengths that New Yorkers go to find a spot that is ‘good for tomorrow.’  As one of the characters says, ‘If you have a good parking space, it’s like gold.'”

News:
An Upper West Sider is suing the state Board of Elections to test whether Ted Cruz should be on the ballot for the primary, given that he was born in Canada. “Korman, 81, of West 96th Street, declined to comment. But his lawyer, Roger Bernstein, said Korman is an independent who wants to resolve the matter before the New York state primary in April.”

A construction worker was killed by his van in Central Park on Monday. “A construction worker inspecting his work van died after the vehicle suddenly began to roll, crushing him beneath it in Central Park Monday morning, police said. The man, who was dressed in a MSM Empire Construction Co. shirt, stopped his white construction van on East Drive near The Loeb Boathouse to examine a mechanical issue around 6:40 a.m., authorities said.”

Shane Richards is making waves on the Manhattan College basketball team, despite long odds. “There was no chance the skinny kid from the Upper West Side was ever going to have the goods to play big-time college basketball.”

Jerry Seinfeld has a neurotic Dachshund, so he had a celebrity dog trainer come by. “The sausage dog, one of two the comic owns, barked so manically every time Seinfeld walked into the room that he complained to Millan, “I’m loved by millions, and hated by one dog.'” On another note, can we bring Seinfeld back and make a show about this incident?

In other Seinfeld news, Steve Martin opened for him at The Beacon.

guest
guest

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

4 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
zeus
zeus
6 years ago

Re Seinfeld:

The dog doesn’t get the jokes.
Most 2 legged these days don’t either.
Saw the show.
Jerry’s not that funny anymore.
Blah, blah, blah…..

0
Reply
auntiedi
auntiedi
6 years ago

I think, perhaps, you meant to say yada, yada, yada?

0
Reply
Ted
Ted
6 years ago

Walking into Central Park one beautiful afternoon at 81 and CPW, I noticed a couple waling towards us, him pushing a double wide stroller.

The two children in the stroller both had large balloon animals that I assumed were from a party. The younger child was crying in that, “I want my older sibling to get in trouble” sort of fakey way, and said, “He hit me first”.

The mother said, “why don’t we try to forget about who hit who first and just enjoy our animals.” One hits the other with a balloon again. Bedlam ensues.

I notice the father who is looking ahead into the middle distance with this vaguely bemuse, exasperated look on his face, as if thinking, “Really, this is my life? I worked so hard for this? Things can’t stay like this forever. Can they?”

The father was Jerry Seinfeld.
But at that precise moment he was nothing but a dad enduring his kids meltdowns. No amount of Seinfeld cash could change the situation.

0
Reply
92nd street
92nd street
6 years ago

“I may have stepped on her arm”

0
Reply

YOU MIGHT LIKE...

Central Park Conservancy ‘Tightens the Leash’
NEWS

Central Park Conservancy ‘Tightens the Leash’

June 28, 2022 | 12:29 PM
Bank Robber Flees With Nearly $4,000 From Chase Branch on Broadway and 95th
CRIME

Bank Robber Flees With Nearly $4,000 From Chase Branch on Broadway and 95th

June 28, 2022 | 6:50 AM
0
SHARES
0
VIEWS
Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
Previous Post

WHO IS TO BLAME FOR FAIRWAY’S FAILURES?

Next Post

WHY JUDY GOLD LIVES ON THE UPPER WEST SIDE

Next Post
WHY JUDY GOLD LIVES ON THE UPPER WEST SIDE

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