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HELP US SOLVE THE BACKYARD CHICKEN MYSTERY

March 27, 2014 | 10:20 PM - Updated on March 28, 2014 | 12:31 AM
in ABSURDITY
22

chicken
A chicken living in a backyard in Madison, Wisconsin. Photo by Emily Mills.

Wanted: one squawking chicken, allegedly kept in the backyard of an Upper West Side building.

This week, we received a tip about a chicken on the loose in the backyard of the block between Riverside Drive and West End Avenue between 84th and 85th street. Yes, this all seems farfetched, but we trust the tipster — she’s given us reliable stuff before. And really, who would make up a story about a chicken?

She also sounded pretty pissed off:

“Can you investigate a live chicken being kept in a backyard on the block between riverside and west end between 84th & 85th? Someone has one and it goes nuts clucking and squawking almost every day!”

“The noise reverberates between the buildings. It’s quiet now. But every day it squawks and clucks during the late morning/early afternoon.”

We did a little low-key investigating: browsing through 311 complaints in the area, checking in with state assemblywoman Linda Rosenthal’s office (Rosenthal is a big animal rights supporter). So far, no birds have turned up.

That’s why we’re asking you, dear readers. Have you seen/heard this chicken? Is there some other animal or thing that could make a sound that could be mistaken for a chicken? We would love a photo of this feathered friend. We want this chicken to be our new mascot. But we don’t want to eat its eggs. Because the New York Times said city eggs are often polluted with lead.

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EL
EL
11 years ago

Someone has been watching too much Orange is tge New Black.

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1
1
11 years ago

Agree with FL.

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SHL
SHL
11 years ago

As a fellow resident of that block–and especially as a freelancer who works at home during JUST the hours mentioned and who’s hyperaware of various annoying noises–I haven’t heard anything faintly resembling a chicken or rooster (though we have cardinals, finches, robins, bluejays, crows, and sparrows aplenty). There must be some pun on fair or “fowl,” but I’m too chickenhearted to think about it.

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G Gomez
G Gomez
11 years ago
Reply to  SHL

If your apartment is not bordering that particular yard, you might not hear anything at all. The sound might bounce off the buildings immediately surrounding it and be very annoying, yet not be detectable from the street.

For example, I face the courtyard of the 95th street homeless shelter. Sitting in my apartment, I often hear screaming fights and loud music from the shelter rooms facing the courtyard, but if I step out of the building and go into the street, I can’t hear it — the buildings block the sound.

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SHL
SHL
11 years ago
Reply to  G Gomez

Actually didn’t mean I couldn’t hear chicken or other backyard sounds from the street. My apt faces the back, and I hear louder birds from as much as half a block toward Riverside–and when it comes to people’s al fresco brunch and other conversations, more than you’d believe!

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G Gomez
G Gomez
11 years ago
Reply to  SHL

I’m not saying the chicken is necessarily there! I have no idea. I’m just saying that you might not be able to hear it from wherever you are. I can’t hear things from across the street when I’m in my apartment.

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Bruce Bernstein
Bruce Bernstein
11 years ago
Reply to  G Gomez

it sounds like at the end of the day the entire case against the 95th Street Homeless Shelter is that it is as inconvenient to a few of its neighbors as a single chicken in someone’s back yard.

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G Gomez
G Gomez
11 years ago
Reply to  Bruce Bernstein

I also like how you don’t think it matters if people in my building are woken in the dead of night or prevented from working at home by screaming, blaring music, and glass breaking. YOU can’t hear it from your apartment, and YOU don’t get rodents from the garbage in the courtyard, so it doesn’t matter, right? I had to call 911 just today because a couple was having a screaming fight that lasted over an hour — and it’s not the first time that’s happened. But hey, you can’t hear it from Riverside drive, so who cares?

I still don’t get why you’re so opposed to making the grossly overpaid shelter owners accountable for their lax, crappy management of that shelter. Don’t you even feel sorry for the former SRO tenants who are still in there or forced to move out? (when the building was an SRO, the courtyard was quite peaceful.) How about the homeless people in that building who aren’t throwing garbage and screaming, and just want a decent place to stay? They’re affected as well.

But no. It doesn’t affect YOU, the self-appointed champion of… who exactly? As far as I can see, it must be Aguila.

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Bruce Bernstein
Bruce Bernstein
11 years ago
Reply to  G Gomez

just for the record, OF COURSE I want the landlord at the 95th Street homeless shelter to live up to their contractual and moral responsibilities.

My point was, for all the “the world is ending” rhetoric we have heard about placing this shelter there… the sole substantiated problem is noisy music and loud domestic arguments. Welcome to NYC! Noise of that type is tyhe #1 complaint for 31.. and very few of the complainers live next to homeless shelters.

i never knew your issue was that Aguila should live up to their contract. I thought you wanted the place OUT.

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G Gomez
G Gomez
11 years ago
Reply to  G Gomez

Finally, I should also note — I could hear this screaming clearly even though (1) it was coming from a room across a courtyard a building wide, (2) I had my windows closed, (3) I had both a fan on (to block out the noise of loud music coming from the shelter) and a TV on. I think it’s a reasonable assumption that it wasn’t a friendly dispute over the Yankees versus the Mets.

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G Gomez
G Gomez
11 years ago
Reply to  G Gomez

This could be a domestic abuse situation. It could be two people hopped up on drugs or armed with weapons. No way for me to know that. There have been a couple of stabbings/murders in homeless shelters in the neighborhood. (The fact that the fighting is also disrupting the neighbors is a separate point altogether.)

I very rarely call 911. (Frankly, I very rarely bother with 311 for a noise complaint — they’re not likely to respond in a prompt manner.) But the police will tell you themselves that you SHOULD call 911 if you hear a fight, especially if it appears to be escalating.

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G Gomez
G Gomez
11 years ago
Reply to  G Gomez

I’ve got news for you, M. Two people screaming and threatening one another for an hour IS considered an emergency. A situation like that can erupt into violence at any moment — and often does. Someone could get killed or injured if no one intervenes. I once called 311 in a similar situation, and they transferred me to 911, telling me exactly that. And since the police responded and stopped the fight, apparently they considered it an emergency as well.

If someone is blasting their stereo or having a loud party, that is a matter for 311. Fights are a matter for 911.

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M
M
11 years ago
Reply to  G Gomez

911 is for emergencies. Using it for other is selfish and means ppl with real emergencies have delayed response because of you. Use 311 or dial the police precinct to report noise violations.

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G Gomez
G Gomez
11 years ago
Reply to  G Gomez

Who said anything about a week? I was talking permanently.

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WhatsUpDuck
WhatsUpDuck
11 years ago
Reply to  G Gomez

Have you two done your week-long housing swap yet? Keep us other readers posted.

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Reply
G Gomez
G Gomez
11 years ago
Reply to  Bruce Bernstein

Your logic, reasoning, and wit are truly unparalleled.

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Reply
Deep Under
Deep Under
11 years ago

1 episode of Orange is the New Black is one episode too many

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Reply
ScooterStan
ScooterStan
11 years ago

Re: “…Have you seen/heard this chicken?”

Yes, and it WAS delicious!

Sorry…punchline to the “So, Ma, did you like your present?” set-up line from an oldie about the guy who sends his mother a verrry exotic bird as a Mothers’ Day present.

🙂

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Rebecca Elise
Rebecca Elise
11 years ago

I love Orange is the New Black. Cant wait for season 2.

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Reply
WhatsUpDuck
WhatsUpDuck
11 years ago
Reply to  Rebecca Elise

Just wanted to add that they were filming OITNB on 87th Street about six weeks ago. Let’s see if the UWS somehow makes an appearance on the show (which is primarily taped at Kaufman Studios in Queens).

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Reply
gardenia
gardenia
11 years ago

Why would the eggs be polluted with lead ?

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Hawker
Hawker
10 years ago

Seen from home on W85th:
A chicken in a backyard coop at approximately buildings 343-347 West 84th.

0
Reply

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